A Word from the Lover of Our Wayward, Wayfaring Hearts

Don't condemn yourself.
I am your God who has redeemed you.  You are no longer your old self, but my new creation.
   I have called you out,
   I am establishing you in my purpose.
Keep walking in my way, my light --
be faithful to me with all your moments
and you will not be led astray, even by your self.
I am yours.  I am with you.  You are mine.  I am with you.

Do not be discouraged, neither let your heart be troubled.  It's okay to take it slow.
Each day will come, and I will always be right here.
Trust me, lean on me, depend on me to go before you and also stay right by your side.  I will do what needs done -- do not fear 'messing up' because when you're walking and speaking and conducting your energies mindful of me,
there is no misdeed.

   I know it must be hard for you to trust, to relinquish your independently working things out, but the beautiful truth of this is I know exactly where we need to be, what needs to be done there, and how to do it -- not to mention I have all the 'resources' necessary to carry it out fully and well, in my timing.  Let me remind you; I am God.    For even more beautiful truth, realize that you're only forfeiting your 'independence' for a new life with me.  I promise you with everything I am, I'm worth it.  (I'm allowed to say this because I am God :).)
    I love you -- adore you!  There's no one else like you.  No one else can love me the way you do.  I don't know anyone else who can take your place.

  To know me, take a chance.  Just take my hand -- walk with me -- I'll take care of the rest.

   I love you and want to share every day with you -- to explore together, to love each other, to teach you all I know about how Holy my Father is, how Just, how Powerful -- how He so desires to set His Kingdom right, shower His people with good, that they may live in the joy of knowing Him and loving Him -- celebrating Him -- together.
   And we can help make this possible - you and me - bringing unfading traces of His good wherever we go, blessing His people by meeting all their needs, as He so delights and desires to do, by His power.
   He shares it freely with us so that we may proclaim joy, freedom and peace to places of His Kingdom that have grown dark with fear, self-imprisonment and pervasive unrest -- places that have forgotten His reign as King, and the grace and life in His Holy name.

   So let's be together, you and me, to speak peace and testify to the truth in love.

Four; 1-2-3-4, Years Ago Today. What's Changed?

Hopes and Dreams
seem, at times, oddly hard to come by. Like now, for instance. 


There are no definite plans for the part of my life that will take place after summer.


and I think I'm finally okay with that.


As long as I'm doing my part to take a keen, active [involved, not passive] awareness of those things toward which my eyes have been attracted or my heart has grown soft, life will happen as it needs to. It's hard not to be confident when I think about how God is using those efforts to guide these feet. Thanks for that.




Some things I do anticipate for my future:


- a garden, vibrant, brimming with life! and BIG so I can share / peddle my vegetables. 
hopefully there will also be a raspberry patch around there somewhere


- an ultra-simple lifestyle, at least for a time. i'm talking no bedframe, matress on the floor,
limited decorations, no furniture
(okay maybe a couple pieces.)
I like my rooms accommodating, but empty enough that I'd feel comfortable to attempt a 
handstand. I'd be ecstatic to be t.v. free,
but mom says I at least need basic cable, "you know, for news and stuff."
And I say okay
compromise:
tv somewhere but 4, 6 (,8) & 10 shall be its only friends. There will be trips to
the market as necessary to prepare my fresh, wholesome, not-processed, nutritionally-
excellent meals. Kitchen table optional. [At least for now.]
I'll reduce reuse and recycle like this planet's greatest reverse-bandit. 
Yesterday's Silk carton is today's planter. 
And so on, and so forth.
Excess Schmexcess.


As my mind and heart conspire so this list shall be inspired.


Toodles.

3/19/2012

Don't mean to get all retrospective lately, but it's entertaining for me to assess what's been going on all this time.  People always pose that question, starting with "five years from now...", squeezing too much life out of our numinous aspirations against the tightest-woven expectation-grade cheesecloth.  It's healthy, but a strain.

  My five years from this last post is nearly here, and what to show for it?  I've graduated with a degree I may or may not have the heart to give my life toward expounding upon educationally or professionally, at least as its typical course might dictate.  My personality hasn't changed much.  My voice is still soft.  I started a garden.  Our dorm has no television access.  I could do a handstand in here if it weren't for the new discomfort of blood to the head.  Can't even hang upside down from the couch anymore without my the back of my eyes feeling like they're planning their out-of-this-socket trajectory.  This aside,  Four-Years-Ago Me would be proud of the Four-Years-From-Now Me.  That's great.  But what of?

Lessons I have, blessedly, learned:

"It's not what we eat but what we digest that makes us strong; not what we gain but what we save that makes us rich; not what we read but what we remember that makes us learned; and not what we profess but what we practice that gives us integrity." - Sir Francis Bacon

I could be disappointed nothing has changed, but there's no lie more lame.  Lots has changed (I've even forsaken soy milk for almond except at coffee shops where they've yet to catch on.)  The more I think of the changes, though, the less consequential they seem.  As humans, we're walking enigmas, changing and staying the same more every day.  Should I be surprised?

This March-uncertainty is a theme for my young adult life.  (For further evidence, see every year since this last green post.)   Like any worthwhile theme revisited, though, has come new insight about the One Who made me, who has prepared my blueprint and works me into it every day, though I'm blind to His design.

What hasn't changed is God's faithfulness.  He's got a great design in mind, with an even more substantial purpose, and I intend to live up to it by His grace.

I pray God makes us faithfully, boldly compliant and pliable
trusting and unhesitatingly hopeful.

Not a house on earth so glorious and wise as its architect.

this time last year

MONDAY, MARCH 14, 2011

If I ever own a creature, I'm inclined to name it Patchouli.

God's Will

"Be joyful always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
  1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

"He has told you, O man, what is good;
and what does the Lord require of you
but to do justice, and to love kindness,
and to walk humbly with your God?"
  Micah 6:8

You Are to Me

every poem I've never written
every conversation we've never had
every walk we've never shared
every
single
cup
of
coffee
I
wish
wasn't
the
only
one
at
the
table
every story I'd delight to hear
but for the meantime am only desperate,
and
every breath I've never felt.

And still,
 inordinately
unshakably

• vital.

I'm often grieved over how it seems the meadow can never be with the woods.  Today my heart eased when I realized they can at least hold trees in common, and feel roots the same.

note to self

what you're reading is no universe.